Somedays ago, the daughter was on the way of coming to her mother. She came, she lived and now, after all the celebration, she is on the way of leaving.
Today is Maha Dashami, the tenth day of Durga Puja. We have only few hours left to see the immersion of the idol. I am sitting in the famous Belur Math now. We came here on the day of Maha Ashtami. We reached here just before the Sandhi Puja was about to start. The flame of the diya was high.
We witnessed the puja, and all other rituals. On the evening we witnessed a grand Sandhyarati (the Arati and prayer performed at the evening).
Next day, we witnessed the Maha Navami Homa and other puja. And again at the evening we witnessed the grand Sandhyarati.
Yesterday, on the day of Maha Navami, I was asking the goddess my questions. I asked her something, I have been asking her since months. Perhaps, since years. I asked her the same today, once again. And she answered.
I was drowning, the mother saved me.
I am typing this post sitting on the mission premise, right in front of the goddess with her children. My sister, my Maa and Baba are waiting in the long line to see a glimpse of the goddess in the mirror, called Darpan. Here is given a giant screen also, where people like us who couldn’t stand in the line, can see the glimpse of Mahamaya from outside.
Sitting here, conversing with myself, and the goddess, I had a feeling that I am privileged to be a writer.
Yes, I can write. I can pen down my thoughts, I can imprint my scars on the paper. I started typing this post to make me aware once again, I can write. This post was like a dare for me. For months, I was suffering from a dilemma between some conflicts of my mind. To write, or to stop writing. Though somehow I managed to write eight posts for My Friend Alexa, but I was suffering from a pain inside. A dumb pain, that can’t be expressed to anyone. I was shedding tears in silence, crying within. Longing, seeking. The mother healed me. Today, standing here, the mother made me realized, it’s a blessing that I can write. I embraced the feeling. As if, the mother said to me, this Dashami,
Let all the darkness of the heart get immersed.
Let all the fear, pain and agony get immersed.
Let all the negativity in you get immersed.
Instead, welcome the divinity in you, embrace the power Maa Shakti has bestowed on you.
Thus, I told myself once again, this time, more firmly, that I am a writer. I am a woman with voice, and it’s a blessing.
Maa Durga has given me this life to be a writer woman. And writing is the worship to me.
In this way, I worship Mahamaya. I receive the divine power. I see the glimpse of Maa Durga.
Wish you all Shubho Maha Dashami.